The True Lives of the Food Network Hosts
Sunday, January 21, 2007 | posted by Mike
Sometimes, when people are talking to me about this site, I'm asked what my favorite kind of posts are. Simple answer: The ones I don't have to write.
Chip from Milwaukee, one of our readers, has sent along some good stuff in the past. After seeing our post about the "sheltered" life of Giada De Laurentiis, Chip decided to take a look at the real people behind our favorite Food Network shows. Actually, I suppose it's more of an guess about what they'd be like if they were "normal people" like you and me.
It's good stuff and I hope you get a kick out of it like I did. Thanks, Chip!
Rachel: That great, friendly neighbor right down the street from you in the middle class neighborhood who is always having people over and has all the kids hanging out at her house (‘cause she’s the cool mom.) If you need anything, Rach will be there for you. Drives a Mini-Van.
Emeril: The guy with the big screen and the big bar in the basement where the guys gather to watch the game and drink beer. He makes great chili and ribs and is a member of the beer of the world club. He is popular with everyone. Drives a Ford Explorer or Jeep Liberty.
Tyler: Ditto, just a younger crowd. Drives a Toyota Tundra.
Bobby: The guy who is always yelling at the kids to get off his lawn. He’s probably a decent guy, he just seems cranky and misunderstood. Drives a Ford Expedition.
Paula: The mature next door neighbor your wife visits to complain about you and talk about Oprah and General Hospital. Always has cookies and fudge available for the lovelorn. Drives a Toyota Camry or Nissan Utimia.
Giada: Lives in a gated community in a big house far beyond anything you’ll ever own. Drives a Ferrari.
Sandra: Ditto, except her house is larger and she’s a snob. Drives Lexus LS or GS.
Ina: Giada or Sandra’s neighbor except she doesn’t act like it. Drives a Beemer or Mercedes.
Michael: Either neighborhood, but the house is immaculate. Drives a Subaru (which is also immaculate.)
AB: He’d probably be my favorite neighbor. He’s weird just like me. But what a great conversationalist. And he owns a pong game! Drives a restored ’72 Nova or a Jeep Wrangler.
(I didn’t include Mario for fear my wife would run off with him.)
